Case Studies

I came to Ben in pieces as I was rapidly promoted to a senior position in academia in which the difference between how I appeared and how I felt became more and more extreme. I felt alone and an impostor and deeply questioned and persecuted myself after every interaction. In time I began to understand how much this experience of my self was rooted in my difficult, extremely difficult relationship with my father and the neglectful experiences of my childhood which had impacted on my emotional development and feeling of confidence. Through strategies, understanding, practice I am now able to hold my role with more confidence, far less self attack and increasing effectiveness.

As my company was in the process of being sold I suffered extreme forms of emotional experience and doubt. Fear of the future and intense grief and moving on from what I had created were addressed carefully with Ben. I held the position well of managing many, many moving parts to ensure a successful transition and address the many legacy issues that arose and achieved significant financial success.

After an extreme form of shame arising in a promotion failure at a senior level in my firm, I worked regularly with Ben to address the feelings that arose and think practically and tactically about the next steps of my career to re-establish my confidence and potential. This ended with securing a far better promotion in another firm several years later. Ben’s steadfast support was extremely helpful in this process.

As a founder when I lost control of my company following series B funding I faced a crisis of being undermined systematically and the Board turning against my vision and heart of the company. Through the many crises that happened I worked effectively with Ben to manage the feelings arising, continue to stay in touch with my vision and purpose, and eventually to leave effectively and restart my new business. Being supported to be accurate and effective and take key decisions at critical times processing the irrational behaviour of others was extremely important to turn this process of survival into a new imagining of my life and ways forward.

In the high stakes arena of executive leadership finding a guide who understands the unique pressures at play is crucial. I found Ben to be that guide – offering a lifeline of clarity and purpose. The crisis I was in turned into a turning point and offered me the chance to grow in unexpected ways.

Thank you Ben – the presentation to the Board meeting went really well. They are excited to change direction as we discussed and the interventions we went through had a real result. Thank you for your input this week. It was invaluable.

Ben supported me through the terrible occurrence of the sudden death of my wife, a professional crisis and terrible bereavement and emotional issues for my children. Over time and grief Ben supported me to remarry and integrate two families and address my family business successfully. Thank you.

Ben supported me to move back to the UK, expand my business and achieve great commercial success during Covid as well as developing and maintaining my relationship through crisis and deepening contact with my children.

I’ve been carrying around these childhood trauma all my life. It’s an unending burden I think about every single day in silence and it hasn’t been addressed and is now spilling over into a personal relationships and my professional performance. It’s hard work but I feel so grateful that we finally with Ben’s guidance addressed this, lanced the boil as he called it, and faced and acknowledged this. We are a work in progress on healthy behaviours that lead to far greater satisfaction.

I had not spoken to my father in 30 years. Through working with Ben I gained not a fabulous relationship but a healthy relationship with my dad. But the biggest improvement has been in my relationship with my wife and children. Having conversations with my father before he died, allowing things to be said that were unimaginable and making connection was a profound event.

I was suffering from extreme forms of addiction in terms of alcohol use and habits of secrecy and avoidance of intimacy with my wife which placed a serious strain on the relationship resulting in deep misunderstanding and trust issues. By addressing them through open communication channels and understanding the original routes of the traumatic behaviour behind the addictions I began step-by-step to take back control and develop new strategies of self-management and communication. I have more perspective and understanding and experience having developed more options to trust, communicate and express my needs and wishes within the relationship rather than outside the relationship.

I had an affair. Ben helped me get back to a full and beautiful relationship with my wife. Thank you.

I had a binge cocaine habit and sexual addiction which put my marriage at risk. Working with Ben I identified the reasons for the deep unhappiness for my behaviour. I began to address this directly with my wife and actually resolve things. My relationship with my children improved and I really feel the benefit of a more satisfying, communicative and fulfilling life.

My wife was at the end of her tether with my alcohol addiction and manic-depressive behaviour. By going to Ben and talking about how to manage my mood swings and alcohol addiction I understood myself better take control of my feeling about it. Now I’m in a much better place.

Following the suicide of a very close friend I went on the six-month bender taking many, many drugs. My ability to function was extremely reduced, the business that I had built was in total jeopardy. By addressing guilt, pain, sorrow, grief and rage of what happened I began to stabilise, stopped taking drugs, gathered myself and forming a new great relationship. In my recovery I supported my company to go on and succeed with significant financial benefit.

I’ve been a high functioning successful businessman, then entered a period of intense depression and inability to function and went to Ben to realise that my children were reaching the age that I was sent to boarding school. This had triggered me into memories of the extreme, sadistic abuse that had occurred. I began to understand that the rage and anger that I was feeling around my children and wife were those feelings from original events experienced at their age. Through working with Ben I began to understand, control, and direct my fury to the characters who had abused me originally. This lead to far better and healthier relationships with my children and wife.

I am a highly successful senior medical consultant. I was in a complete personal and family crisis through addiction and infidelity. With Ben’s help I have addressed a maintained family leading to happiness and contentment that I could not imagine.

What I came to understand was that the habitual coping strategies I had been using which had been effective were no longer sufficient. Through the work with Ben I discovered that relying on them had become counter productive and the crisis was a way of developing a new way of living personally and within my leadership role. I cannot believe where I am personally and the success of the company a year on from when we first met.